Mom Encourages Self Esteem Around Makeup: It's 'Fancy,' Not Pretty


I remember sitting on my mom’s bed as a little girl, feet swinging off the edge, while she did her makeup in the mirror. I wasn’t allowed to wear makeup myself until I got older, save for the cakey dance recital ~looks~, but I was guilty of trying (and failing) to apply winged eyeliner on myself when I was unsupervised.

Kids soak up everything we say, and makeup can be a touchy subject. You don’t want to ruin the innocent fun, because it can be a blast to play princess or Hollywood star in your mom’s makeup kit. But you also don’t want to harm your kid’s self-esteem and have them feel that it’s a necessary factor to look and feel good.

Maggie Katz shared an adorable exchange with her young daughter on TikTok, sharing how she creates a more positive conversation around makeup.

In the video, Katz and her daughter are doing their makeup together in front of the mirror. Katz tells her, “You look so fancy.”

“I do makeup with you!” her daughter says (how stinking cute).

“And why do we do makeup?” Katz asks.

“Because it’s fun and we get to look fancy,” she continues. “But are we pretty no matter what?”

Her daughter responds with an enthusiastic yes.

In a comment, Katz explained that this mindset isn’t just for makeup, or for girls.

“I have a son too (he’s a few years older) and it definitely works with him too,” she said “I’ve worked to remind him that we can all find beauty everywhere we look and that everyone is special in their own way”

TikTok users shared their love for Katz’s “fancy” strategy in the comments.

“I’ve been trying to think of a way how to explain why I do certain things to my girls without making them believe they “need” to do it. This is amazing. 🙏🏻” one user said.

Some users shared other ways they’ve rephrased negative self-talk for the better, like this alternative for clothes that are “too small.”

“Between this and ‘oh I’ve gotten too strong for these pants’ when they’ve gotten too small my brain is being rewired,” the user shared.

Many also expressed that they wished they had heard more of Katz’s kind phrasing growing up.

“I needed this as a kid🥲” said one user.

“my mom used to say, ‘you’re going out without makeup? just put on some mascara you look so pretty with it!’ i was 12,” another user shared.

“Well let me tell you now,” Katz responded. “You are beautiful exactly as you are.”



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