Dear Men: If You Say You'll Be Home By 3, Be Home By 3

In a recently viral TikTok video, one man asks all his buddies on the golf course the same question: What time did you tell your wife you were going to be done? The video timestamp indicates it’s well after 5 p.m., but the Chads and Kyles out there golfing proudly admit they told their partners they’d be home hours earlier.

If that makes your blood boil a bit, you’ll probably appreciate another TikTok video that has since gone viral: a response from Paige Turner (@sheisapaigeturner). “Let’s just call it what it is: a blatant disrespect of women’s time,” says Turner in a stitch of the infuriating post. “Men telling their partners that they will be home at a certain time when they have no intention of actually being home at that time is disrespectful.”

It’s also deceitful. Just sayin’.

“When you tell your partner you’re gonna be home at 5, but you don’t actually mean 5, you mean 7… 8, because you were at the clubhouse for two hours with your buddy? They made plans according to the time you gave them,” reminds Turner. “Maybe they booked an appointment. Maybe they scheduled grocery pickup. Maybe they intended to meal-prep for the week. But now that you’re not home, they can’t do any of those things.”

Guess who will be the first person to mention that the house is out of milk or ask if dinner is ready? Here’s a hint: He’s at the golf course again.

Not only is it inconsiderate to do this to a partner who is at home, counting on you to be true to your word, but it’s often part of a bigger double standard.

“We should also consider that most of these men often times are dads. [They’re] off golfing and their partners don’t mind that they golf, but it is an expensive and time-consuming hobby,” points out Turner, adding, “And I can almost guarantee these men on Sunday are not watching the kids for six hours straight so she can do whatever the heck she wants.”

Turner also notes that these types of partners are the same ones texting or calling every five minutes when she leaves for an appointment, errand, or outing. “You best believe he’s holding her accountable to the time she said she’d be home, because he has plans,” Turner says. “He has things he needs to do that day. His time is important.”

Of course, “everyone’s time is important — especially women’s time.”

Turner’s message hit home for a lot of women and moms out there, who took to the comment section to add their gripes.

“’She hated me going golfing’ — no, I hated that you were never back at the time you said you would be and my plans were ruined,” said @Soph.

“But let their wife be gone for an hour and they’re texting every twenty minutes asking when she’ll be home. They think it’s funny too 😒,” lamented @🖤annamhayes✨.

Confirming as much, @Sophia Maria Fugarino shared, “As a hairstylist, every single one of my mom clients gets multiple texts when will you be home. Even if they’re just in for a haircut. It’s so unfair.”

“I work at a golf course, guys literally admit to taking their time cause they don’t wanna be home,” said @kara.

Referencing the original video, @TabTok🇵🇸🇨🇩🇸🇩 fumed, “And you can tell that they don’t even CARE that they’re late.”

“‘Why get married if you hate your spouse?’ is always my question,” revealed @X.

So, yeah. Games run over. Tee times change, or the group in front of you plays slower than slow. But a good partner realizes the issue and makes a choice to either leave the game early or at least call and apologize.

Concludes Turner, “When men go out to golf, usually women don’t mind that they’re golfing. What they mind is the blatant disrespect that happens when men go off to these kinds of hobbies. They say one thing and they do another thing. It is rude. It is just point-blank rude. And it fails to acknowledge that women deserve respect.”

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