My sister married into a “present family.” She and I come from a family that isn’t so into the whole gift-giving thing, so she was totally caught off guard when the gift-giving experience became an Olympic sport as she entered into this new world with her partner’s family. We do Secret Santa! One gift. Fifty dollar budget. Done and done.
So, what exactly is a present family?
What is a present family?
Podcaster and comedian, Heather McMahan, shared her own experience on her podcast, Absolutely Not, joking about how bizarre it feels to enter a high-present family from the other side.
“We’re not a present family, I get it. But man, when you … just wait till you get older and maybe marry into a present family, it is bizarre,” Heather explained to her guest, Logan Crosby. “Some people only show affection through materialistic things, and it is a wild thing to experience.”
Logan responds, “Yeah, that’s just, and I mean, maybe one day, look, if I’m married into a family that they wanna buy me…”
Heather then cuts him off and jokes, “Wait a minute, look, let me just say, I’ve never received the gift. I have not received a gift.”
The two bust out in a huge fit of laughter.
Present families are in a league of their own, and as Heather said, sadly, it’s kind of a way for emotionally stunted families to show they care. In summary, you buy gifts for every single member of the family — parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, nieces, nephews, etc. Literally every member! And then on the day they all get together, everyone goes around and opens their gifts. It takes hours.
What is a non-present family?
After the clip circulated, TikTok users weighed in on the difference between a present family and a non-present family, debating which one is better.
“I had no idea there were non-present families,” one user said.
“I come from a huge present family. Married into a low present family. It feels cheap,” another noted.
Another said, “Noooo I love buying gifts! It’s not bc materialistic things = affection but buying something bc you know someone so well is really special. And you absolutely would get gifts in our fam”
One TikToker admitted, “I was raised in a no present family and married into a present family. It definitely makes me so uncomfortable being showered with gifts. I feel like It’s transactional like I owe them something 😭”
“Non-present giving family here. Present families make me so overstimulated 😂,” another said.
One user questioned, “Is a no present family zero presents for real???”
One user responded, “My family does experiences vs presents, so you get gifted like tickets or a vacation or something”
“My wife and I are zero presents for each other throughout the year. We do get some stuff for Christmas so the kids don’t see us with nothing. But overall not a gift giving couple,” another replied.
Guess the debate is still up for which is better when it comes to gift-giving around the holidays!
