We all know the infamous stereotype of boy moms, right? Boy moms get a bad rep, and sadly, there is a reason there’s a stereotype. Some of the products of moms who raise only sons are not-so-great. They’re incapable. They’re entitled. They think they are God’s gift to the world because Mom told them so!
If we really want to get into the psychology surrounding the toxicity of boy moms, we could even argue that boy moms are so obsessed with their sons because it’s the first unconditional love they’ve ever received from a man (I know, YIKES!), and they’re desperate to hold onto it.
So, in the case of the toxic boy moms, what happens to everyone else left in their wake? Especially daughters?
One woman, the daughter of a boy mom, says that people like her don’t get the recognition they deserve, alluding to the fact that her own mother treated her very differently from her brothers.
“You know what we certainly do not talk enough about? We do not talk enough about being a daughter of a boy mom. What it is like to grow up as just a casualty of being like the only daughter, the youngest daughter, to a mom that is a boy mom,” Allison Leigh Benner says in her viral video.
“I have so many stories. I don’t think I’m like legally allowed to talk about everything right now. Like it’s just not in my best interest just with my current situation. However, once that is done, I will definitely, definitely tell all these stories.”
She continues, “I was telling my husband yesterday all of these stories that happened like in my childhood or in my high school years. And his jaw was on the floor. He was like, ‘That is not normal.’ Like we see, oh, little five-year-olds and the boy moms, like what they do to those five-year-olds. But we don’t talk about the daughters of those boy moms and what it’s like to grow up with a mom who is a boy mom, who has a son who can do no wrong in her eyes. And it is sick like to this day, some of the stuff that goes on with my family dynamics is appalling.”
After her video gained traction, her page was flooded with comments from TikTok users who completely agreed with Benner’s sentiments as well as some who offered empathy and advice.
“I recently learned about the term ‘baseball sister’ which boy moms use to describe the sister stuck at all her brother’s prioritized sports events,” one user wrote.
“I was the only girl with 3 brothers. One of the most validating moments of my life was when all 3 of my brothers told me — you got it the worst and mom did not like you,” another said.
Another wrote, “Yes! My brother was constantly in trouble, even way into adulthood. My mother always defended him. It was never his fault.”
“This is 100% the vibe in my husbands family. My sister in law was the UNfavored child. Like he could do no wrong and she could do no right. And I’ll never forgive my in laws for that,” one user noted.
“I grew up with 2 older brothers and they were definitely my mom’s favorites. She criticized everything I did, and still does. I have 2 boys and a girl now and she will never feel what I did,” another shared.
One user questioned, “Wait, isn’t a boy mom a mom who only has boys? That’s the only reason I consider myself a boy mom bc I only have boys lol”
The OP replied, “I truly think the definition is changing. It use to just mean you had boys, then it was the moms overly obsessed with boys/lifestyle, now it’s the moms who put sons on a pedestal”
It seems clear that there’s a big difference than being a great mom to boys and being a “boy mom.”
